Let's kick off the series with what's easy and obvious: Introverts and Extroverts.
Introverts are typically thought of as the people who say little or nothing, and extroverts talk all the time. They are so much more than that. Some introverts can be quite talkative and some extroverts rather quiet. Judge them more on how they relax.
Introverts need time to collect themselves before and after dealing with other people, especially strangers. They think before they speak, and you can be pretty sure if they are contributing their idea to a discussion, they've thought it over a few times before opening their mouths.
Extroverts seem to pull their energy from other people, meaning after the party, they are rounding up people to hit the bars with them. When they speak, their ideas are often not fully formed, so never assume the first thing they say is what they have concluded. Sometimes you can just ignore the first few sentences and focus on the end.
In friendships and love, we are often drawn to the opposite of ourselves here. Introverts wish they had the easy social graces of extroverts, and extroverts like speaking for others and drawing shyer people out. They also appreciate being allowed to talk without being interrupted. But by the same token, introverts can be drawn to other introverts because they make so little demands on them to speak, and likewise extroverts don't want most of their conversations to be one-sided.
Here are few examples of where they can be frustrated or downright hostile with each other:
- Resent being ignored or steamrollered by those who speak first, especially when they dominate discussions with half-baked ideas.
- Resent their initial contributions being dismissed as a "working idea" rather than one that has been considered from several angles.
- Dislike being talked at when they have not adjusted to their new surroundings or a change of pace.
- Hate being interrupted, prefer brainstorming sessions to have an orderly rotation of speakers.
- Hate being made to give their opinion or idea before they've had a chance to think it over.
- Dislike the implication they are angry or upset merely because they are not talking.
- Dislike the assumption they are upset or excited because they are talking.
- Need personal space.
- Need time to adjust and also to decompress.
- May have trouble enjoying a vacation if it is in a strange place. The second time around is better.
- Come across as cold because so much of their communication is written, and verbal communication has more modest tone and body language.
- Resent people who stare at them like they are idiots while they talk.
- Often need to develop their ideas out loud, drawing on the contributions and body language of those around them.
- Decompress by interacting with others.
- Often interrupt with an idea or response that can't be contained until their turn to talk, but don't do it out of malice.
- Hate being made to hold in their reactions.
- Hate their ideas being dismissed as undeveloped.
- Prefer to seek out people to communicate- no email for them, thank you very much.
- Worry when their companions do not speak for long periods of time.
- Hate their passion being dismissed as just another thing they are loud about.
- Want to go new places, get restless with routines.